~THE END~

28th May 2008 is the day that i will remember forever....

it all started on the 3rd of April 2007 till now...it have been one year and one month plus time...it's not a short period of time, but now, 28th of May is where the story between us ends...should i feel relieve? should i feel glad? should i feel happy? i really have no idea...it just seems like there is no feeling in me now except than feel of crying...but could i cry out loud? who can i release to? now that i have loose you, can i still release to you and trust you like last time before all this happen? i really don't know anymore...

what kind of feel should i have now? i really don't know what to do or feel...all i know that it is cold inside me, too cold...a feel that i haven't have for a very very long time...last day of your exam, while we went back together, everything for just fine between us...and the next thing i know, everything change on the next day, and i have no idea what happened or what did i did wrong to you to make things change till like this....I can't be mad at you, but all i know that i am just disappointed...disappointed on you or myself? i think it's myself...but why am i feeling disappointed in myself? for what? my mind now is totally blank, whatever happen now have left me being a person with no soul...once again, you put me back into a situation where i have to put on a mask to face social...

maybe we are just not faith to be together, and it is time for me to accept those facts and things that i should have accept way long long time back....i'm a guy with no soul now and feels like a steam roller have just ran over me without feeling any pain...what's the point of me writing all this in here, will you be reading here...i know you won't, because you won't even log in in here just to care about me...hahaha...you will be the last that i will take it serious in relationship...you know why, because of our story, i already have lost faith and trust in it...because i have gave too much to you which now, hahaha, i know i will need a very long time to pull myself up and stands on my feet again...how many years will it be, i really don't know...but for now, just let me sink as i want to be...because i really don't have that type of energy to pull myself up anymore....

this afternoon was the last time that i will be caring and finding you on the phone, because i know, there is totally nothing in the future...even i wanted to see you, you have turn me down and not willing to just meet me this once...so all i can do is just respect you with this decision...i just can respect...this time, you really have push me too far away from you, and i know is time for me to leave your side because my job is done...as what i told you, i have a job in you life, once its done it will be the end, so now you believe me har...i have tried my best to help you get through some of you hard moment in Kampar...i have done my best and there is nothing that i can do for you anymore...

after loving you for so long, now it have to be the end, i really can't get use to it...but i know i have to do it, in order to make you feel better...this day is the day where i have to stop loving you in front of you, but deep inside me, i will forever love you, without letting you know anymore...because there is no point of you knowing...i will forever love you Evonne Chan Lai Ching...take good care and hope you will lead a better life from now on...our story with ups and downs ends right here as you have wanted all this while... THE END of a relationship that couldn't be worked out no matter what...THE END