~1 year and 1 month~

never thought how time could fly past so fast...and it's already been one year and one month...but after for so long of time, nothing has change, it just remains like how is was and use to be...

April 3rd, 2007 is the year and time where i told you i like you, but now, after one year and one month is where things went screw up between us...i really have no intention to put you into that situation at that moment of time because i know that you still have your exam going on...i really never plan to tell you at that time like how people thought i plan it...believe it or not, it just happen out of no where...i really just went over to your place to just have a nice simple chat with you, but than, as usual, things never ever goes the way i want it to be...all i can say now is i'm really sorry, sorry to make you emo at that time when you're facing exam and all the stress...i'm really so so sorry...

ever since stepping out your room at that night, i really regret of making the decision, i know i will regret it even right after i told you at that time, but i know, by saying that way and doing so will only make you feel better and not so stress about it...promise is a promise, i can't turn things back, no matter how much i regret, how much i want to turn time back, i can't go against the promise that i made...i have to bare the consequences of my saying and decision...

never ever thought that i could go after a girl who doesn't even like me at all for one year and one month. relationship between wanjun and me, 2 years plus, thought that was the most serious that i could be and i even told myself that she will be the last. but E really took over everything, things that even wanjun can't do or control...i really have no idea why...i really don't...really thought about it seriously, is it because i must get what i want in life or what, but to this, i really can answer to myself, it's not because i have to get what i want, but it's really because i really love her...love that i never imagine that could be more than wanjun. could i get over E like how i got over the pain that wanjun have put me in? could i really let go of E...i really don't know, i really wish and hope that i could have an answer to it...how long more this situation will be like this...frankly speaking, i really don't know, i really don't...how long more should i wait, or how long more i could wait???? i'm just too tired...i really just want to get away from everything....